Chapter 1.5 Proms and Pregnancy

Another kid leaves the nest.  Good riddance.

Wait, what the fuuuuuck?

Holy fuckballs, Dog Face is going to prom.  Now I've seen everything.

Paper boy will not deliver until this shithole gets cleaned up.  Bad Beatrice!  If she wasn't knocked up ALL the time, she might actually clean the damn house.

Here we go again.  I cannot find an Italian name that starts with K.  This will have to be another J name.  Justina?  I give up.  Perhaps J-Girl.  Because it will be a girl. And this is the LAST one.  I don't care if we don't have a spare.  No more damn babies!

Wonder where your damn husband is...

Wait???
WHAT???

WE HAVE A SPARE!!!
BOOYA!

Junior.  That's his name. He's an eccentric genus.  I would prefer to use him as the torch holder but rulez is rulez.  Unless someone gets wacked.  Yep.

Hey look at this, Angelo is NOT in jail for this arrival!  Whoda thunk it eh?

Beatrice:  Baby goes on floor, amirite?
Angelo:  You are a failure as a mother, but predictable.

Dogface:  So my dad is in the recycling industry, you know, he deals with trash.
Promdate:  My dick is this big.
Dogface:  I so wanna tap that.  Do you think my flippers are sexy?
Promdate:  Uh, I gotta go.  You know.  Pee.  Wait...nevermind.  I already um...

Birthday!!

Still hideous.

This is her formal wear.  I.can't.even...

Another birthday!

Not so cute anymore.

Time to boot this one out of the nest.  Goodbye Helena.  Don't buy any mirrors.  2 words for you hunny:  Plastic Surgery.

Angelo decided to go out on the town to find a little strange, unfortunately he ran into his daughter Gia.

He gave her a gift for her graduation.  She seems happy.

He ran home like a bad boy and was rewarded for doing so.

Beatrice knows how to keep her man from straying.

This one has a bad habit of checking under his bed for monsters and gets freaked out. Finally he is asleep in his bed.

Janice rolled the slob trait when she aged up.

Ah so cute!!! I just want to pinch his little face.

Damn it Beatrice!  Bad mommy!  He is NOT a football you dumb fuck.

Angelo steps in to save the baby from severe brain damage.  I think I see a birthday happening...

Another ugly kid.

Angelo leaves for work.

9 kids. NINE.  Hope these two age up to elders soon.

Next up:  More Birthdays

Chapter 1.4 Will Blogger Allow Me To Post Pictures? (yes)

So far so good Blogger!  Now quit being buggery #goshDurnit

Beatrice has a a bit of a bug.  Every small chore she does for the children result in a bit of a FAIL.
Bad mommy!  She holds the infant upside down and claps her hands.

Oh little baby (can't remember your name) , that is not a boob.  That is ass. You will not like any milk that may be squirted from there.  Yea yea, I know, gross.  #FuckingDealWithIt

She looks like "so wadda you want me to do, hold the thing?"
Idiot.

She looks a bit of a tardo but after a hundred kids, she's bound to be nuts.

Gia and Helena visited Eugenia's place for a few moments.  Eugenia still hasn't taken off her cap and gown.  Loser.

On the rare occasions when Angelo isn't in jail, he tries to teach his teens to drive.  #WayToBeAGoodDad asshole.

I named the first male (heir to the throne, Mr. Generation One) Ignacio.  I chose brave and friendly since the roll gave him evil and grumpy.  He is the 7th child.  Beatrice's 8th child (another damn girl) was named Janice.  I rolled her traits (good and loves the heat).

Beatrice rarely leaves the nursery.

Angelo is on his second genie lamp and has wished for money more than once.  More than twice.  #TrySixTimesNow

Gia wants to know where babies come from.  Angelo has no clue.  A new one appears every time he gets arrested.  #IsItACoincidence?

 The ugliest Good Fella child is an aspiring artist.

Birthdays!  Janice is now a cute little toddler and Gia is a young adult.
#GetTheFuckOutOfMyHouse

Gia dresses just like her dirty hoar mudder, Helena the dog faced girl found a friend who is equally ugly AND a big fattie to befriend.  Bitch is in the way of my photos #FatFuckPhotoBomb
Ignacio's birthday is today too.

Ignacio rolled hates the outdoors trait and Beatrice seems to be knocked up AGAIN.
DAMN IT.  This will be a girl.  I just know it.

And I'm sure it will arrive on Angelo's next arrest.

 

Another graduation.  Time for Gia to get the hell out already.

 What in the fresh hell is Ignacio wearing?  Oh this kid is gonna be beat up bad on the playground.

Dog face brings the pretty one to the graduation.

And Beatrice tries to upstage her own daughter.  "Oh you're graduating?  Guess what?  I'M KNOCKED UP!  AGAIN!!!"

Idiot.

Next up, Proms and pregnancy.